1. RINGO AND AUNTIE JESSIE are always quarrelling about one thing or
another. But they booth agree it would be exciting to go on a Mystery
Tour. "Your Uncle Jack always liked a Charabanc Trip" says Auntie Jessie.
"And this is a MAGIC trip" adds Ringo
2. A few days later, VERY early in the morning, they set off to start
the tour. Auntie Jessie looks at the B-I-G bus and smiles : "It's all
yellow and blue ! My favourite colours !" When everyone is ready JOLLY
JIMMY JOHNSON (THE COURIER) climbs aboard.
3. "Good Morning Ladies And Gentlemen, Boys And Girls ! WELCOME TO
MAGICAL MYSTERY TOUR! I am your Courier. All my friends call me Jolly
Jimmy and YOU are ALL My friends! Everyone comfy? SPLENDID!"
4. Then Jolly Jimmy introduces the Tour Hostess, THE DELIGHTFUL WENDY
WINTERS. "And over HERE .. ." he goes on "is our driver for the trip, a
wonderful driver (WE HOPE!) whose name is ALF. Away- way-way we go, Alf!
5. Needless to say Auntie Jessie finds something to argue about. "You
ain't coming with me anymore" she tells Ringo. "Who bought the tickets?
I DID, DIDN'T I !" replies Ringo. "Yes, YOU bought the tickets" agrees
Auntie Jessie "BUT I GAVE YOU THE MONEY!"
6. At the front of the bus sits a Sad Little Man in a funny old uniform.
"Who IS that man?" whispers Wendy Winters. "That's Mr. Buster
Bloodvessel" answers Jolly Jimmy "He's quite harmless. He thinks HE'S
THE COURIER ! Last trip he thought he was THE DRIVER!"
7. The other
passengers are enjoying The bright sunshine, the green countryside. "Excuse
me" says LITTLE GEORGE to PAUL "I'd like to take a photograph of your
young lady." "O.K." says Paul. "All right" says MAGGIE, THE LOVELY
8. "This IS my lucky day!" chuckles Líttle George who loves to take LOTS
of pictures. Click! Clackí CLICK! Meanwhile PAUL BEGINS TO DAY- DREAM.
His thoughts fly FAR AWAY. He is standing high up on a warm, grassy hill
9. SUDDENLY Paul's daydreaming is over. He hears the delightful voice of
the Hostess: "I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT IF THERE IS ANYTHING I CAN DO
FOR YOU, YOUR WISH IS OUR COMMAND!" "But I wonder where the MAGIC comes
in?" thinks Paul.
10. Little does he know that THE MAGIC IS ALREADY BEGINNING TO WORK!
Somewhere up in the sky, beyond beyond the Little white clouds, FIVE
MAGICIANS study their mysterious maps and gaze into their magic
telescope. They are CASTING WONDERFUL SPELLS.
11. At last one of the MAGICIANS looks up from his work: "THE BUS IS TEN
MILES NORTH ON THE DEWSBURY ROAD AND THEY'RE HAVING A LOVELY TIME!" he
cries. The others dance with glee: "THEY'RE HAVING A LOVELY TIME!!!"
12. Even as they dance THE MAGIC TAKES EFFECT and the bus is SPIRITED
AWAY TO THE AMAZING MUSICAL LAND CIF THE WALRUS! "I AM THE WALRUS" says
John. "NO, YOU'RE NOT" cries Nicola, laughing at his funny feathery hat.
NICOLA is the VERY YOUNG- EST LITTLE GIRL on the bus. "I'VE GOT A
PRESENT FOR YOU!" says John. And he gives her a BIG RED BALLOON. She
hasn't quite enough PUFF to blow it up for herself so JOHN and GEORGE
14. In no time at all everybody is ready for lunch .and the bus draws up
beside a small cafe. Jolly Jimmy leads the way and all the people follow
eagerly because they're HUNGRY! "WHAT A MARVELLOUS LUNCH !" says
everyone. AND IT IS!
15. There is Chicken Soup followed by Roast Beef and Carrots with Thick
Brown Gravy to go over the Potatoes! A small band plays Jolly Tunes in
the corner of the room. Nobody is enjoying himself more than HAPPY NAT.
16. "If I eat any more" says HAPPY NAT "I SHALL FALL ASLEEP!" "Then you'll
MISS ALL THE MAGIC!" warns Little Nicola. While the waiters scurry away
to get the pudding, the band plays a very exciting Spanish Dance.
17. "I'm no Spanish Dancer but I certainly know my onions!" laughs HAPPY
NAT. Up he gets from the table and becomes a FAMOUS SPANISH BULLFIGHTER.
After all that eating and all that dancing no wonder Happy Nat nods off
! 18. So while the others tuck into Strawberry Ice Cream or Aunt Mary's
Apple Pie, HAPPY NAT has a HAPPY DREAM . . . all about his adventures
with a bunch of pretty girls beside the seaside!
The sound of AUNTIE JESSIE PLAYING THE DRUMS brings Happy Nat's
delicious dream to an abrupt end ! Yes, there she is SITTING WITH THE
BAND banging away and singing at the top of her voice!!
20. "I suppose it runs in the family" suggests Happy Nat. "I never know
she had it in her" replies Ringo. Soon the bus is on its way again and
everyone congratulates Auntie Jessie because THEY didn't know she had it
21. Presently Driver AIf brings his bus to a halt outside a STRANGE
BUILD- ING. "What a funny place!" remarks John. "I don't like the look
of it" adds George. "WE'RE JUST PASSING THROUGH" says Wendy Winters
22. Before long Jolly Jiminy has led everybody into an Official sort of
Office. Behind an old desk sits MAJOR McCARTNEY looking Very Import-
ant. Beside him stands SGT. SPINETTI looking over his shoulder.
23. "Just follow me" whispers Jolly Jimmy "and if they try to get you to
join up DON'T TAKE ANY NOTICE!" Now that is easier said than done !
Eventually they leave the Sergeant screaming about haircuts and Other
24. "Now!" says Wendy Winters "We'll split into two groups. All the
Ladies -THIS WAY PLEASE!" "And ALL THE MEN should come with me" chortles
Jolly Jimmy, a special twinkle in his eye "I've got a NICE SURPRISE FOR
"Hello!" says George "We're going into a striptease club." AND THEY ARE
TOO! "Whoops Johnny! Hey! Tee hee hee! cries John. "Front row seats for
all you lucky lads !" shouts Jolly Jimmy ordering up the drinks.
26. "Cheer Up Mr. Blood vessel" says John giving hím a friendly nudge "Sup
up your mille and enjoy the show!" Before the show is over Mr. Blood
vessel HAS FORGOTTEN ALL ABOUT HIS MILK!
27. When they are back on the bus all the Men look VERY PLEASED WITH
THEMSELVES. So do the Ladies but THEY don't say where THEY'VE ben! After
a while Jolly Jimmy jumps up again: "NOW FOR THE MAGI- CAL MYSTERY TOUR
28. WELL! Have you EVER seen so many people IN ALL YOUR LIFE? Everyone
lines up for the start—The Rugby Team, The Little Wrestlers, The Five
Cheating Vicars and ALL the people from the bus. BANG! THEY'RE OFF!
29. It looks as though Five Vicars might win because they are cheating
by RIDING BICYCLES. So some of the others use MOTOR BIKES and CARS which
are MUCH BETTER ways of CHEATING!
30. GOOD OLD RINGO! HE finds the BEST WAY of cheating — BY DRIVING THE
MAGICAL BUS! So the Mystery Tour Team wins the BIG RACE in the end WHICH
SERVES ALL THE OTHERS RIGHT!!!
NO WONDER people are a bit sleepy after all that racing around! Poor
Auntie Jessie nods off and has a dream ABOUT MOUNTAINS OF SPAGHETTI! "Wake
up Ringo! Wake up Auntie Jessie!" It is LITTLE GEORGE speaking.
32. "NO MORE SPAGHETTI!" moans Auntie Jessie. "Come on!" insists Little
George. The rest of the party has already disappeared into a SMALL TENT
standing in the middle of a meadow.
33. "If we A LL manage to squeeze into THAT TINY TENT it will be MAGIC!"
declares Ringo. I won't tell you the MARVELLOUS and AMAZING things which
happen in the tent BUT I WILL TELL YOU IT IS MAGIC!
34. By now the sun is setting behind the hilis and in time to head for
home. SHIRLEY THE ACCORDIONIST plays Happy Tunes while everybody sings
the words. Even MR. BLOOD- VESSEL! All the Magic has made him forget.
35. Funnily enough nobody notices the EXTRA PASSENGERS ON THE BUS. But
there they are . THE FIVE MAGICIANS, SINGING AND LAUGHING ALONG WITH
EVERYBODY ELSE! " WE' RE HAVING A LOVELY TIME!" THEY CHANT.
36. Auntie Jessie and all the other people have NEVER enjoyed a Mystery
Tour so much in their lives ! Thanks to Jolly Jimmy, Wendy Winters AND
THE FIVE MYSTERIOUS MAGI- CIANS. And, of course, THANKS TO JOHN, PAUL,
GEORGE AND RINGO!!! WHOOPEE!